Taking Care of Widows

Well, let me invite you to turn in your Bibles this morning to 1 Timothy chapter 5 as we turn our focus to yet another area of need. And One of the things you'll notice about Cornerstone is we're not a very hip church. and this title is not, a hip title, nor is this a hip, the hippest of topics. It's taking care of widows.

All right. Not something that might normally gather a crowd, but the thing about what we do here at Cornerstone is we just let God set the topic. And whatever God wants to talk about, that's what we let them talk about. So we've started a series to the Book of First Timothy.

And as we have just gone verse by verse through that series, we now come to a large section of this book wherein God wants to speak to us on the subject of taking care of widows. So, OK, Lord, that's what you want to talk about, then let's talk about that. That may not have been what we woke up thinking about this morning, but if it's what you want to talk about, then that's what we want to talk about. there are some churches, and I'm not, I'm not going to take cheap shots and say this is all bad because I can see some value in this, that when they're wanting to plan a church they'll survey the community and they'll find out, do you, do you go to church anywhere and if not, why not, and what church would you be willing to attend, and they'll take that data and process it and then try to craft a church that's reflective of that that input.

And sometimes, not always, but sometimes you get the sense that in all of that surveying they did, they forgot to survey God. In all seriousness, imagine conducting a survey of God. You come to his house and say, Hey, what church would you like to attend? Seriously, I want Cornerstone to be the church that God would want to attend and be present at and to make His presence powerfully felt, wouldn't you?

And so in fact that's the seeker sensitive church that I ultimately want. God is a seeker. He's seeking people to worship Him and He is the ultimate seeker and we want to basically do church the way that He wants us to do church. And if we did survey God and said, Now what would you want in a church?

What church would you attend, I think we would get some answers from Him that wouldn't fit the mold of what We might hear from the community, we would find that God has certain passions and things that He's very interested in that maybe we're not interested in, and one of those topics is the topic of widows. If you survey God and say, what church would you want to be a part of and would you want to attend, One of the things at the top of his list is the subject of widows. I want a church that talks about widows.

I want a church that takes care of widows.

I want a church that provides guidance for widows and how they live their lives and do ministry in the church. It'd be a big thing in the mind of God. In fact, what's striking to me is, as we come to 1 Timothy chapter 5, verses 3 through 16, is how much ink is given to the subject of widows. To men in general, we get one verse, guys, in 1 Timothy.

To the rich, those of us that are rich here at Cornerstone, which is probably all of us, we get 3 verses. To women in general, you get 7 verses, deacons get 6 verses, elders get 10, widows get 14. This is the largest single section of First Timothy. This demographic, the demographic of widows, gets more attention paid to it than any other section of First Timothy, and I think that's very remarkable.

If you surveyed God and said, what, what is your idea of religion? God would say, pure and undefiled religion in my eyes, is this to visit the orphans and the widows in their distress and to keep oneself unstained by the world. That, that's religion. That's, that's what I would want a church that I attend and make my presence known as to be all about.

And so what I want to do with the time that we have is I want to look at five things from 1 Timothy 5:3 through 8, that God would want from a church regarding this matter of widows. Let me begin reading in verse 3, and I'll read all the way to verse 8. The apostle Paul says, honor widows who are widows indeed. But if any widow has children or grandchildren, they must first learn to practice piety in regard to their own family and to make some return to their parents, for this is acceptable in the sight of God.

Now she who is a widow indeed and who has been left alone has fixed her hope on God and continues in entreaties and prayers night and day. But she who gives herself to wanton pleasure is dead even while she lives. Prescribe these things as well so that they may be above reproach. But if anyone does not provide for his own and especially for those of his household, he is denied the faith and is worse.

Than an unbeliever. So God says this is what I want to talk about this morning. So let's go with what He wants to talk about. And as we let's just use the paradigm and we're just surveying Him, Lord, what would you want from Cornerstone?

What would you want from a local church that claims the name of Christ with regard to the matter of widows? And ultimately there's 5 things that I think we can pull from this passage. All right, the first thing that God would would clearly want, as indicated by our passage today, is that he would want the church to teach on the subject of widows. He would want the church to teach on the subject of widows.

nowadays there's messages being preached from pulpits on things like dealing with anxiety, overcoming depression, finding happiness in in this world, having a good marriage, rearing your children. And all of those are great topics. I wouldn't criticize one of them, but clearly in this passage we're told that in addition to all of those other topics, You need to teach on the subject of widows. Look what he says in verse 7.

Prescribe these things. That means provide instruction regarding these things. Paul is talking to Timothy, who is essentially serving as a pastor over the Ephesian congregation in the city of Ephesus, and he's saying, I want you to be teaching these. I'm not just telling you this for your own benefit.

I want you to teach the people of God in the Church of God, in the household of God, about these things that I'm telling you in this passage on the subject of widows. If you go through the sweep of Scripture, God talks about widows a lot. And I don't have time to read through these passages, but in Deuteronomy 14 he talks about widows in the Old Testament law. In Deuteronomy chapter 24 verse 19, he talks about widows and how the Jews, when they're harvesting their fields and they drop a sheave, they are not to turn around and go back and pick it up.

They are to leave it there for the widows and for others. And Psalm 146:9 says, the Lord protects the stranger. He supports the fatherless and the widow. Psalm 68:5, God is described as a father of the fatherless, and a judge for the widows is God in His holy habitation.

God in heaven is concerned about, widows. He's concerned about women who have lost their husbands. And it's not so much the case in our society today, although it can be on some levels, but in these days, 2000 years ago, a woman who lost her husband was legally in a very vulnerable position and could very easily be exploited, taken advantage of, and have a very hard time finding a place in the world. And so God, because of that, pays special care and attention.

To widows and basically says, don't mess with widows. If you do, I'm going to serve as a judge on behalf of widows against anyone that will afflict them in any way. God is saying here in verse 6 regarding widows, he talks about it throughout the Old Testament and in the New and here he's saying to the apostle Paul or to Timothy, I want you to teach, to prescribe, to instruct on this subject regarding widows. There's a second thing that God would want from our church and any church that claims the name of Christ regarding women who have lost their husbands, and that is he would want the church to know the difference between a widow and a widow indeed.

He would want the church to know the difference, to know that there is a difference, and then to know what the difference is between a widow. And a widow indeed. I want you to imagine in your minds there's a broad category of widow, and all widows have one thing in common, and that is that they have lost their husbands. All right, but in that broad category of widow, there is a subset, a smaller category called widows indeed, and Paul makes a distinction between widows indeed and widows.

And it's an important distinction. In fact, look at what he says by way of defining what a widow indeed is. We can piece a few things together. Obviously, a widow indeed is a woman who's lost her husband, but we also know from the text that she is a woman who is truly destitute, meaning she has no living children or grandchildren, no family members that are in a position to be able to provide for her.

Assist her and help her in any way, and she's left alone, meaning she's not just left alone having no family members to provide for her and care for her, but she's left alone in the sense that she's been left without any resources by her husband. Either he died and she just, he left no resources for her to live on. Or her husband passed away and there were a few months of resources for her to live on, but now those resources are exhausted and she is truly left alone without a husband, without any other family members, without children, without grandchildren, and without resources to provide for herself.

Look at how we see this verse 3.

Honor widows who are widows indeed. By the way, let me show this to you. Widows indeed, verse 3, look at verse 5. Now, she who is a widow, indeed, there's that expression again, go to the end of verse 16, that, that, that it, the church may assist those who are widows, indeed.

3 times, Paul makes reference. To widows indeed, and look at how he describes what they are. Honor widows who are widows indeed, but by way of contrast to a widow indeed, if any widow has children or grandchildren, meaning a widow that has children or grandchildren that can provide for her in some way, shape or form is not a widow indeed. Look at verse 5.

Paul provides a very helpful definition of a widow indeed. He says now she who is a widow indeed. And who has been left alone. So we see there that a widow indeed is someone left alone without husband, without children, without family, and without resources that she could live off of.

So she's destitute, but also look at this additional element of a widow indeed. She has fixed her hope on God. For a widow to fit the definition of a widow indeed, she not only needs to be destitute, but she needs to be a Christian. She needs to be a woman who has fixed her hope on God.

This is a synonym, a synonymous expression for putting her faith in God, her trust in God, who sent Christ into the world to save sinners, and to give his life as a ransom for all. This is a Christian woman who's directed her faith. In God, not in herself, not in anyone else, but in God. And not only is she a Christian, but she's a godly Christian.

Look at this. She has fixed her hope on God and continues in entreaties and prayers night and day. She's a prayer warrior. She prays, she prays night, and she prays.

In the daytime, she prays all the time. Now, don't get Paul wrong, he's not talking about a woman who's praying all the time regarding her own needs. Lord, I need this. Lord, I need that.

And whenever you talk to a woman like this, she's so caught up in her own narrative that all she wants to talk about is her own, own needs. Have you ever met someone like that? Not necessarily a widow, but just sometimes you meet people and all they, they're just consumed with their own narrative, their own stories, their own need, and Never even inquire as to how you might be doing. But a widow indeed is a destitute woman who's lost her husband.

She's a Christian, and she's a godly Christian who prays. In fact, go back to chapter 2, verse 1. Paul views prayer as the fundamental responsibility of godliness. He says in chapter 2, verse 1, 1st of all, in other words, the first importance, I urge that entreaties and prayers, petitions and thanksgivings be made on behalf of all men.

And so a widow indeed is not only a Christian woman who's destitute, but she is a woman who takes to heart this fundamental calling upon her life from God to live a life of prayer for her own self and also for the needs of others. I couldn't help but think, as I read this of a man in our church who died a number of years ago of cancer, and as cancer was taking its toll in his body and he was wasting away, becoming weaker and weaker, just months and even weeks from passing away, whenever I would call him or go over to his house to visit him, one of his first questions was always, how can I pray for you?

Give me some prayer requests. And I went over there to minister to him, but sometimes I would catch myself.

It's like, wait a minute, I just spent the last 10 minutes talking about me and this guy's dying. But he would get me caught up in that because he wasn't focused on himself. He wanted to know how the family was doing and how he could pray. That's the widow that we're talking about here.

We're talking about a woman who is destitute. But she has put her hope in God, not in man, not in herself. And she prays, and she prays for herself, she prays for others. This is a godly Christian woman who happens to be destitute without earthly family, earthly resources, and she is without her husband.

That is a widow, indeed. Everyone else, they're just widows who have lost their husband. He makes a distinction. Look at verse 6, but she, by way of contrast to a widow indeed who gives herself to want and pleasure, is dead even while she lives.

Writers suggest that what Paul is referring to there is the fact that there were some people on the rolls in the Ephesian Church, widows that were being cared for who weren't even saved, who were living in sin. They were spiritually dead, but simply because they were widows. The church was providing ongoing help and care for them. She who gives herself to want and pleasure, some suggest this is a reference to the fact that some widows and order who were destitute in order to generate income to live off of, were giving themselves over to prostitution, and such women, Paul says, are spiritually dead even though physically they may be very much.

Alive. Paul would say such ungodly women in verse 6 are not widows indeed. So when you look at this definition, there may be a widow who's lost her husband, who is truly destitute, but she's not a Christian, or she's not a godly Christian. Such a woman would not be a widow indeed.

Or there may be a godly Christian widow, but she's not destitute. She's got children or grandchildren alive. Such a woman would not be considered a widow indeed. Is that making sense, what that definition is?

So God would say, Here's what I would want from a church. I would want a church. Here's the church I would want to attend a church that teaches on the subject of widows and gives time to this matter. I would want a church where people in the church understand.

The difference between a widow indeed and a widow. And then a third thing that God would want from us as a church is He would want the church to discern which of these two categories each widow fits into. Now that the church understands the difference between a widow and a widow, indeed, God would want a local church to take some time to investigate, to think, and to evaluate. And to interview and to try to understand the life circumstances of those who are widows and even thinking about their character, their trust, do they believe in the Lord?

Are they truly saved or are they not? Paul would want the church to expend some energy in discerning amongst the widows which category. These widows fall into or is such and such a widow a widow indeed, or is she a widow, because that would make A huge impact on where the church would go from there. There's a 4th thing that God would want from a church, having established.

Which category widows fall into, and that is that God would want the church to assume full responsibility for taking care of widows who are widows indeed, women who are godly women, believing women, truly destitute without family. Paul says, I want the church to assume responsibility to care for financially, materially and physically such women. Paul would say, I want the church to, whatever from the giving of their people, whatever funds are available, I want funds to be earmarked to address the needs of women who have lost their husbands.

Who are widows indeed.

Look what he says in verse 3, Honor widows who are widows indeed. And by the way, the word that is translated honor there is a present tense in the Greek text. It's be continuously honoring widows who are widows indeed. He's not talking about, a single incident of maybe helping out a widow.

He's talking about ongoing care that's being provided for, a widow. If there's a widow that just shows up at the church and there's an immediate one time need, I don't think Paul would say, you've got to obsess on figuring out the woman's character and is she a Christian? Is she truly destitute? You see a woman by the side of the road and her car's broken down and she happens to be a widow, you don't have to go through all of that investigation to be able to say, what, we can help you with your car.

but in terms of ongoing help for a woman. In a situation like this, for a woman to be put on the roll, as it were, to receive consistent ongoing help, there needs to be this scrutiny and accountability. And if a woman is a widow indeed, then the church should assume responsibility for providing ongoing help for her. What does it mean to honor a widow?

Obviously you respect them, but it means to provide care for them. What's interesting is how he begins this section, Honor widows who are widows indeed. Look at how he ends in verse 16. If any woman who is a believer has dependent widows, she must assist them, and the church must not be burdened so that it, the church, may assist those who are widows indeed.

And that word assist means to provide financial material assistance. So he starts off saying honor widows, and we might look at that and say, well, what exactly does that mean, but it's very clear by the time he gets to the end that to honor widows who are widows indeed is to provide assistance to come alongside of them and to help them and to provide. assistance for them. The church takes on that burden of caring for widows who cannot care for themselves and who have no family that can care for them.

Nonetheless, they are godly women. By the way, and I think we'll talk about this maybe more next week. The For Paul to say, here's the women to provide ongoing help for, they need to be, you need to truly assess whether there's a need, whether there's other people and their family that can meet that need, assess their faith in the Lord and their character. Paul's talking about widows, so that that's what he's applying it to.

But let's back away from that. Paul in this passage is validating the appropriateness Of being careful and prudent in the disbursement of funds when it comes to Mercy Ministry. That the church disperses or that we as Christians disperse. Now again, if you're like the Good Samaritan and the guy's beaten and left half for dead by the side of the road, you don't do all of that scrutiny, all right?

You take care of the guy, but in terms of ongoing help for somebody, you don't just give money and resources to whoever asks, especially if it involves help in an ongoing way. Paul here is validating the appropriateness of getting to know the person and trying to understand their character and their faith in the Lord, and is there really a need here? And if so, what is the extent of the need? Anyway, God would want our church and any church that claims the name of Christ to assume responsibility for taking care of widows, this afflicted and neglected portion of society back in Bible times, the church takes such women under their wing and provides for them.

Well, there is a 5th thing that God would want from Cornerstone and from any church that He would. consider attending and making his presence strongly felt at, and that is he would want the church to instruct its members to take care of widows in their own family. All right, widows indeed, church, you take care. The whole church body takes care of those widows, widows who are not in the category of widows in need.

In other words, they're Christian women. Who are godly women, but they have family members, they have children and grandchildren, there, there's households, there's people in their family that are still alive and, and even in the church, Paul would say those widows, here's what the church does for them. The church goes to the family members and instructs them to provide care for these members of their own household. In other words, the church is careful.

And says we're not going to take this burden upon ourselves. We are coming to you as the grandchild or child of this widow, and we're instructing you to care and to help in this situation. Look what he says verse 4, but if any widow has children or grandchildren, they must first learn. In other words, you go to them and you teach them something.

Now, how does the church approach a family member like this? Like there's a There's a widowed, a widow in the church. Maybe the church has been providing help for her like the Ephesian Church was, and they're realizing based on what Paul says that actually we shouldn't be doing this. Their son or daughter or grandchildren need to be doing this, so we're going to need to go to them and tell them that this is their responsibility.

How does the church do that? How do they do it tactfully? Do they just go to the grandchildren or children and say, Hey, this is your responsibility. We're not doing this anymore.

Is that what they do? how do they frame that ministry to the children? This is, this is like the most beautiful part of this passage to me. Because Paul is essentially giving Timothy guidance when you go to these family members and tell them, listen, this is your ministry of providing for your widowed mother or grandmother.

Paul couches this responsibility in such language that anyone who hears it presented this way would say, I want to do this. It's so full of motivation. In fact, as the church instructs such family members to care for their widowed mothers or grandmothers, Paul wants Timothy to do this and wants the church to speak to these family members in a way that ultimately provides them 6 motivations just based on this passage. If I ever came to a family member, as Paul instructs, Here I would really make sure that I emphasize these 6 things.

I wouldn't just say take care of your widowed mother. I wouldn't just say that. I would try to embody in my instruction to them these 6 motivations that we find here in these verses. Let's try to go through these with the time that we have left.

All right. The first motivation is this it's godliness. It's godliness. You come to someone and say, Hey, I've got news for you.

that we're going to, we're going to stop supporting your widowed grandmother, and God is telling us that you need to do this, but we want you to know that for you to provide care for this relative of yours in their time of need, this is godliness. This is what godliness actually looks like. Look what he says in verse 4. He says, but if any widow has children or grandchildren, they must first learn to practice piety or godliness in regard to their own family.

Go to them and say, this is what godliness actually looks like. Godliness shows itself in many forms. One of them is, you take care of the members of your family, and you minister to them. And what guys, we've got people in our church family that right now are having to exert a lot of time and energy in providing care for They're widowed mothers, and I think by way of application this would, this would cover both mothers, fathers, grandmothers, grandfathers that are unable to care for themselves.

Paul's talking about widows, so that's the focus, but he would definitely apply this. Toward any parent or grandparent that cannot care for themselves, and as the family seeks to minister to them, they need to hear this loud and clear that says this is godliness. This is what godliness looks like. We have people in our church that in the past, in the recent past and distant past.

have shepherded their their parents through the dying process until they have passed away, and they provided care for them throughout that and as a pastor, I was privileged to be able to behold that and I would say, as God would say, I have watched godliness on display. It's not like, man, I'd love to do this godliness thing, but I've got to take care of my mom. I've got to take care of my dad. I can't wait till I'm done with this, and then I can go do this godliness thing.

No God would say this is godliness. God looks at your actions and says this is godliness when you provide financially. Financial care for a relative that cannot care for themselves, a parent that cannot care for themselves. You are practicing godliness when you provide physical care, very mundane practical physical care, even bathing.

An elderly mother or grandmother that cannot bathe herself, God looks upon that and says that is godliness when you take care of them as they are dying, when you help them with decision making because they're just at a place where they can no longer have a sense of what is best for them, and so you have to, you have to work with them in making decisions and then sometimes you have to end up making decisions for them. And they don't always appreciate those decisions that you make for them, and they disagree with it, and they may accuse you of various things and be angry as a result of that.

And so you make those decisions, and yet you're feeling conflicted. I get, I get phone calls from people just saying, here's a decision that I've made for my parent, and it seems like the right thing to do, but 50% of me is screaming at me saying that this may not be the right thing to do.

What do I do in this situation? And, and I don't have easy answers. Good grief, I don't have easy answers. But what?

When God sees a son or a daughter or a grandson or a granddaughter agonizing over these things and praying over these things and trying to make the right decision, and even if that decision is not appreciated by their parent or grandparent, God looks upon that and says that is godliness. That's godliness. As a child or grandchild is ministering to their parent or grandparent, they, in the dying process, they will often see them at their worst as their bodies are falling apart and their minds and their emotions are falling apart, and often the child or grandchild providing care will receive the brunt of that.

As the grandparent or parent will take out their frustrations.

On the child. And as the child bears with that and still tries to do the right thing and to move towards this loved one and provide care, God says this is godliness. This is what godliness looks like when, when you have as a family money set aside for a certain purpose and you realize because of a need in a parent's life that, that, that you're going to have to take those funds and you're going to have to redirect them. God beholds that and says that is godliness.

We've had people in our church have to change their schedules and make tremendous sacrifices in their time and their resources, making arrangements for flights and flying across country or out of the country to be with. Mom or dad or even in state or out of state here in this country driving long distances back and forth and back and forth once or twice a week in order to minister and to be there with their mom or dad providing care for them in their time of extremity, their time of need.

God looks at all of that and says that's godliness. God's not sitting up in heaven saying I can't wait for you to be godly as soon as this is over with and You can work on the godliness thing.

No, God says this is godliness. This is what it looks like. And so we go to children and grandchildren and say, you have a widowed mother. You have, you have parents here that are in the extremity of need, and God has you in their life to provide for them, and we encourage you to do this because this is what godliness looks like.

That's the first motivation. The second is it's payback. and providing for a parent or grandparent in their time of extremity, you are returning to them a portion of what they've given to you. He says in verse 4, if any widow has children or grandchildren, they must first learn to practice godliness in regard to their own family and to make some return to their parents.

Basically, your thinking needs to be My parents have given me so much. Through them, I have life, they have provided for me. In fact, I think what Paul would do is he would, he would encourage you to take time to think about all the ways that your parents have blessed you growing up, even if they weren't perfect parents are far from perfect parents. Stop and think and be grateful and, and go all the way back to your infancy, even though you won't remember that.

You can imagine the kinds of things they had to do, right? when you were an infant, the pain of your mother in giving birth, to you and the recovery from that birth, and I'm not trying to be funny here, changing diapers and putting up with the stink of all of that and, and, and bathing you and And, and providing a shoulder for you to cry on and, and providing for you food to eat and clothes to wear and shelter day after day after day without you even thinking to say thank you for those things.

How many times did they serve you without any thanks or appreciation? In fact, sometimes you were mad at them and you didn't agree with decisions that they made, and you voiced that, and they had to take that on the chin.

On your behalf. Paul would say, think about, these things and, and then realize, what, this is, this is your time. This is your time to give, to return back to them a portion of what they have given to you. USA Today recently published a report where they said that for A child born in 2008 will cost the parents over $220,000 by the time that child reaches 17.

They haven't even hit college yet. Over 220,000 and that's even higher when you adjust for inflation. So think about that. Think about just the volume of money that your parents have, have spent on you.

Even the pagans understood this. Listen to what Plato, the philosopher said. He says next comes the honor of loving parents to whom we have to pay the first and greatest and oldest of debts, considering that all which a man has belongs to those who gave him birth and brought him up, and that he must do all that he can to minister to them first in his property. Secondly, in his person and thirdly, in his soul, paying the debts due to them for their care and travail which they bestowed upon him of old in the days of his infancy and which he is now able to pay back to them when they are old in the in the extremity.

Of their need. I was reading a couple of weeks ago a story, not even a Christian story, it's from Roman culture. A girl was sitting on the knee of her dad, and just a little girl, and she said to her dad, she says, I can't wait until you're old and gray, and I can take care of you. And have you lived with me.

And even in pagan culture, that was just a virtue, highly esteemed as this daughter in a precocious way appreciated her parents and the care they provided for her, and she was even long before the day arrived that they would need it. She was looking forward to the time. When she would be able to make a return to them for what they had poured into her. It's time to pay back when parents reach their time of extremity of need.

And by the way, especially young people in this room. Just, just a tip, you don't have to wait until your parents reach the extremity of need. Before you can start returning to them. That love, the gratitude, and the service and the blessing that they have lavished upon you.

In fact, practice now. Let that govern your attitude so that when that day comes, it's not like, oh man, I got my own kids to feed and I got this and that to take care of. And now, I've got this need in my dad's life or my mom's life, and what am I going to do now? No, it's have it be something that's just another step forward as you're seeking to pay them back.

They will one day need you very likely, as you needed them for years growing up, and you have opportunity to return the blessing. There's a third motivation that is provided in this instruction that Paul gives to children and grandchildren. And that is that it's worship. Actually, taking your resources, your time, and, and directing it towards your widowed mother or grandmother.

And again, by extension, he would apply that to your father, any parent, grandparents that is suffering need and is unable to provide and care for themselves. Timothy is told to say to them, this is worship. Yes, it's godliness. Yes, it's, it's only fair.

And it's an opportunity to pay back to your parents, but also in serving your parents and grandparents in this way, you are worshiping God. Look what he says at the end of verse 4. This is acceptable in the sight of God. It's acceptable.

This is the language. of sacrifice, the language of worship, the big thing on everyone's mind when they offered to sacrifice to the Lord is, is this going to be acceptable to God? And God had certain standards and prescriptions in the Old Testament. It's got to be this, this and this.

It's got to be exactly so for the sacrifice to be acceptable to me. But what is being said Here is that when you invest yourself in providing care for and loving your, your, your grandparents or your parents in their time of need when they need you and they cannot provide for themselves or care for themselves, you serving them in this way is actually an act of worship that is acceptable to God. That word acceptable means warmly received, welcomed. By God.

This word is used in Luke 8. There was a crowd waiting for Jesus on the shore of the Sea of Galilee, and when Jesus arrived to that location, it says the crowd welcomed him. They were all waiting for him. Yesterday, the New Orleans Saints team in their home stadium came running out on the field before the game started.

And the tens of thousands welcomed them. That's what this word means to enthusiastically, to gladly welcome something or someone. And what we're being told here is that loving your parents and your grandparents, providing practical, even menial, mundane care and provision for them is an act of worship to God that He warmly receives. In other words, you're doing something for your mom or dad.

And they may say thank you, they may not, but all of a sudden you hear a thank you and you look up and God's saying thank you. I received this. And you realize, whoa, wait a minute, this is not just a horizontal transaction. I'm not just doing this for them, I'm doing this for God.

They're not the only ones receiving this, God receives it. We find this exact language in Philippians 4:18. Paula just received a gift from the Philippians. And he says, I have received everything in full and have an abundance.

I am amply supplied, having received, and that word received is the same root word that is translated acceptable here in 1 Timothy 5. I have received from Epaphroditus what you have sent, and what you have sent is a fragrant aroma that's ascending up. It is acceptable or literally receivable sacrifice, while pleasing to God. You guys have done a great thing for me, and I receive it.

But I want you to know God receives what you have given as a sacrifice. Well, pleasing to him. He takes in that aroma. And enjoys this act of worship that you have done in being kind and generous to me.

Paul is saying that when you show love to your mom or dad or your grandparents in their time of need, yes, horizontally you are serving them, but God is in heaven taking in that pleasant aroma of that sacrifice, and he says this is an act of worship to me, and I receive it. This is, this is well pleasing to me. This is acceptable. I accept this act of worship.

That ought to encourage All of us Sometimes we might think, man, I, I wish I could be with a cornerstone family worshiping God with my church family on a Sunday morning, but instead I'm here at the hospital and I'm, I'm trying to help out with the situation with my mom or dad or my grandparents. I'd love to be worshiping, but instead I'm here. No, God says you're worshiping, and I, I, I receive your act of worship. that you are offering up to me.

Also, 1/4 motivation is that it's a good testimony. He says in verse 7, prescribe and teach these things as well so that they, and I don't have time to elaborate on this, but the they is referring back to verse 4. If any widow has children or grandchildren, they must learn to practice godliness. Make return to their parents.

This is acceptable. Verse 5, she who is a widow, singular. Verse 6, she who gives herself to want and pleasure, singular. That's like a parenthesis where Paul stops and defines what he's talking about.

Then he comes back in verse 7 and says, prescribe these things so that they, that they is referring to the children and the grandchildren, so that they may be above reproach. And caring for your parents in this way, you will be above reproach. When we looked at the qualifications for elders, we learned that the first qualification for an elder is that he's above reproach, and we may have, may have wondered what does that mean to be above reproach? We know a part of what that means.

An elder is a man who cares for his parents and who loves them and happily provides for them in their time of need when they cannot do so for themselves, and a man or a woman who's unwilling to do that is someone who is under reproach rather than above reproach. There's yet another motivation that Paul offers, and now he ends on a negative note here. To not do this, to not do what you're being counseled to do and assuming responsibility for caring for your parent or grandparent in their time of need, to not do this is to deny the gospel.

That's a staggering statement, he says.

But if anyone does not provide for his own and especially for those of his household, certainly this does apply to dads providing for your wife and your children and parents providing for your children. It does apply to that in the context. The primary focus though is on you providing for your parents and grandparents and their time of deprivation. And need.

And if anyone closes his heart to his parents, grandparents, and refuses to provide for them in their time of need, that person has denied the faith. And as we often say, whenever you see the expression the faith in the New Testament, that is almost always a synonym for the gospel. He's saying, if you, if you close your heart to your parents and refuse to care for them in their time of need, you are rejecting, you are denying the gospel. And I want to encourage you guys both in your care groups and also this week to think about what in the world does the gospel have to do with caring for my parents.

Think about that. Paul's making a connection here that we might not have immediately thought of. If I don't care for my grandparents or my parents in their time of need when I've got the means to do so. The Bible says I'm rejecting the gospel.

I'm denying the gospel. What, what is the connection there? Let me throw a few things at you. first of all, part of the gospel, a central fact of the gospel is that Jesus perfectly fulfilled the law, right?

The only reason his sacrifice was sufficient to atone for our sins is because he perfectly obeyed every provision in the law of God, the fifth commandment of which is honor your father and mother. Do you realize if in one second of time, if Jesus failed to honor his father or his mother on even one occasion, his sacrifice would not have been sufficient to atone for our sins, and we would all be on our way to a Christless eternity. And there'd be nothing we could do about it. Our salvation depended upon him fully honoring his father and mother and obeying every other command.

Also, think about it, while Jesus was on the cross, gasping for air, you, you go to the flashpoint of the gospel, which is the cross, and here you are gathered at the foot of the cross, and you're like, I want to understand what the gospel has to do with taking care of my parents in their time of need. And grandparents, and so here you are at the foot of the cross, and here's Jesus hanging on the cross, close to death, and he looks down at his widowed mother. And says, Woman, behold your son.

Directing her attention to John, John, behold your mother.

He's saying, John, I'm, I'm leaving here. I want you to take care of her as if she's your mother. Mary, I want you to look to him to take care of you as if he is your son. He's dying.

He's dying. And he's honoring his widowed mother. You discover that right at the center, the flashpoint of the gospel, which is the crucifixion of Christ. And also think about it, on the cross, what is he doing with regard to his heavenly Father?

He's honoring his Heavenly Father in John 14:31, Jesus says, so that the world may know that I love the Father, I do everything he says, Let's go. Jesus not only died on the cross to show us that he loved us, but he died to show the world that he loved his father. He was honoring his father and obeying him on the cross. So here he is on the cross.

He's honoring his father, obeying him, doing what his father wants, and he's also tending to the needs of his widowed mother and making arrangements while dying for her. Also one of the purposes for which we are saved. One of the whole purposes for which the gospel works in us is so that the requirement of the law might be fulfilled in us. One of those requirements is that we honor.

Our father and mother. And so for someone who claims the name of Christ, they claim to be saved by this gospel, this Savior who perfectly honored His Father and mother, and while on the cross was perfectly honoring His Father and also honoring His earthly mother, and this gospel that I'm saved by that is supposed to bring about a change that That so transforms me that I now begin to fulfill the requirements of the law. Anyone who claims to believe in that gospel and then looks at their parents or grandparents and closes their heart to them and refuses to provide care for them, Paul says that person has just denied the gospel.

Does that make a little more sense now?

There is a strong connection. There may be other connections. Lastly, real quickly, a final motivation. is to not provide care for your parents or grandparents in their time of need makes you actually worse than non-Christians.

Not only does it make you a gospel denier, but it actually makes you worse than those who don't even believe the gospel. He says if anyone does not provide for his own and especially those of his household, he is denied the faith and he's worse than an unbeliever. why he says that? Because even nonbelievers in Paul's day cared for their parents.

I read from Plato earlier and there's other writers in his era. In Greek law, sons and daughters were required morally and legally to provide for their parents and if they didn't, their civil rights were taken away from them. Another Greek writer says, Let there be a scrutiny of public speakers in case there be any speaker in the assembly of the people who neglects to maintain his father or mother or to give them a home. If someone refuses to care for his parents in their time of need, don't let them speak publicly in political assemblies.

Another Greek speaker said, I regard the man who neglects his parents as unbelieving in and hateful to the gods as well as to men. Aristotle said it would be thought in the matter of food that we should help our parents before all others since we owe our nourishment to them, and it is more honorable to help them in this respect. The authors of our being even before ourselves. Aristotle taught.

That if you only have enough food for your parents and yourself, your parents eat and you starve. That's what a pagan taught. And Paul says, if you guys refuse to do what you're being counseled to do, not only are you rejecting the gospel, but also you're, you're actually behaving at a lower level morally than even the pagans around you. So this is a serious calling, a serious responsibility, but also a delightful opportunity for us to fulfill the purpose of the gospel in our family relations.

Let me ask you to bow your heads. This may not have been a topic that you woke up this morning thinking, man, I really want to learn about widows today. But But I appreciate you just rolling with what God wanted to talk about and Viewing that as important enough to Focus on and listen to. Let's be instructed and encouraged by his word.

We're going to take up an offering in just a moment. We would encourage you to give as the Lord leads. Let's pray together. Our Heavenly Father, we thank you for your word.

We thank you for the practical help that it provides for us. I pray for those in our church family even seated in this room that are dealing with issues and complications. And making decisions and trying to decide what's best for parents or grandparents and. These, these situations, Lord, are, are not simple.

Often they're fraught with, with complexities and people are left conflicted no matter which way they go or what they decide, but I just pray that in the midst of all of that mess and complexity that they would just be lifted up and encouraged and knowing that hey, what we're doing here is godliness. What we're doing is godliness. What we're doing is we're we're actually worshiping God. God is looking upon us and He's receiving this as an act of worship.

And may that exalt the most mundane of tasks from the simplest phone call to a service rendered or to a dollar shared. A trip to the hospital for an appointment, time invested, may exalt every one of these things. To the highest level, knowing how important these things are to you. Lord, thank you for the privilege of giving of our offerings to you.

Receive these funds and use them for the glory of Jesus Christ. It's in his name we pray, and all God's people said,