The Step That Brings Victory (8 of 12)

Thank you, Bill. We have a Savior who turned water into wine, a Savior who provided an unnecessary meal for a crowd of 5,000+ people, a meal they all could have gotten for themselves. We have a Savior who washed His disciples' feet. That was not a medical emergency, but through such things, large and small, Christ demonstrated the greatness of His loving heart, and we have a chance to Do that, the same as a church body to one another and to those that God brings to us.

So go online and explore how you might, be useful in, in this way. Let me invite you to turn in your Bibles this morning to Romans chapter 12, Romans chapter 12 for our time of study in God's word, this morning. We, are continuing on the topic of forgiveness, and this is not a series that will go on forever. In fact, today, We come to the 4th and the final step of forgiveness.

And so if you want to give a title to the message, it would be The Step That Brings Victory, The Step that brings victory. I've actually gotten conflicting feedback from the congregation. I've had people telling me, keep preaching on this topic, don't stop, and I've had people tell me, please stop preaching on this topic. So I don't know what to do.

you can pray for wisdom about that. but this is the final step, the step that brings, victory. we The way we've been framing this over the last couple of months is that ultimately there are 4 steps of forgiveness, and when someone wrongs you, the first step to take is go to the cross and do some gospel thinking. We looked at a number of gospel truths that you can be pondering that God can use to get you from a place.

Anger and bitterness to a place of forgiveness and grace. Step number 2 when someone wrongs you is choose to forgive and then actually execute that forgiveness that you've just chosen. We looked at the mechanics of what forgiveness looks like. We forgive in the context of prayer.

We forgive with specificity. And persistently and in a way that mirrors the reality of God's grace and forgiveness that He has shown toward us. Last week, we looked at the third step of forgiveness, and that is to pray for the person that we have forgiven, ultimately to pray that God would do real and practical kindness. to the person that has sinned against us, whom we have forgiven.

So we get done forgiving someone in the presence of God, and then we say, OK, God, what do I do now? And God would say, here's the next thing I want you to do. I want you to pray for that person. I want you to come into my presence and use the access that you have with me, you have power with me.

And through the shed blood of my Son, you have access into the holy place, you can come into my presence, you can ask favors for yourself and for other people. And I want you now on the other side of having forgiven this individual, to ask me to do something for this person. Ask me to do real and practical kindness. Think of some blessing, that you might want to ask me to do and then ask me to do that for this person.

And guys, among the blessings that we asked for, we should ask that one day the person who has sinned against us would come to know God's forgiveness, the joy of God's forgiveness for their sin against us. Jesus at the cross said, Father, forgive them, they don't know what they're doing. Even while he was being stoned, said, Father, do not lay the sin to their charge. And so we should pray, God, I pray that you would so work in this person's life to bring them to a place of repentance and brokenness, that they will come themselves to know the joy of your forgiving grace.

May the day come that they are One day beside themselves with joy. Over the forgiveness and grace that they are receiving from you. There is a 4th step of forgiveness, and that is, perhaps the most active of steps, and that is to make yourself an agent of real and practical, good in the person's life, the person that you have, have forgiven. So you're asking, you're in prayer, and you're saying, OK, God, I'm doing what you tell me to do, and I'm asking for you to do real and practical kindness, give some undeserved blessing to this person, that has sinned against me that I've just forgiven.

And so you're asking God to bless them in some way, and then God says, actually, I'll do that, but I also need a volunteer through whom I can render some blessing in this person's life. I need a volunteer. Through whom I can bless. And that's when we may be tempted to say, Well, Lord, that's what my brothers and sisters are for in Christ, because we may not be eager, but God says, no, actually, I want you.

You're the perfect person. You say, well, that person's my enemy. God says, that's why you're the perfect person to do this. And so we then move to the 4th step.

We're not just asking God to bless them. We actually allow God to make us agents of blessing in the life of this person who has sinned against us, that we have forgiven. And so this is the step. The final step of forgiveness that we come to this morning.

Just a couple quick thoughts about this final step. This is the step that seals the deal of forgiveness. This brings us back full circle to Romans chapter 12, verses 20 and 21, which, if you'll recall, were the verses that launched us in this series anyway. Part of the goal of this series on forgiveness has been To, look at where the instructions of Romans 12:20 and 21 fit in in the larger scheme of forgiveness.

and so we need to take this step. This is what seals our forgiveness and serves in a way to protect it as we're going to see this morning. To try to forgive somebody, guys, and to not take this 4th step is like going through a whole lot of trouble to acquire something of immense value, and then failing to lock that thing up and to keep it somewhere where it is safe. Imagine that I went through a whole lot of trouble to acquire some valuable piece of artwork and And I search high and low and then I find it and I spend $2 million.

That's how valuable this thing is, and I bring it home and I put it up on our wall and then imagine after having done that, I then leave every window unlocked and open and all of our doors unlocked and even opened, and get in my car with my family and with the windows and doors opened, I drive away with my family for a two week vacation. That's ridiculous. That's unthinkable. That's actually what we do.

With this valuable thing called forgiveness when we choose not to finish the forgiveness and to take this 4th step. If you try to forgive without taking this final step of doing real and practical good to the person that has wronged you, you will leave your forgiveness tentative and insecure and vulnerable to theft or to damage. You will leave your forgiveness in as much jeopardy as I would have left that piece of art in jeopardy in the example that I gave. So If you really want to seal the deal with forgiveness, you need to take this 4th step.

I would also suggest that this step, this 4th step, is a great indicator. It's a great measuring rod by which you can determine whether or not you've really forgiven. there are people who say, yes, I've forgiven, but they've not taken this step and they're not even interested in taking this step. I'll never forget a number of years ago I was doing premarital counseling with a couple and, and it became evident early on that the gal in this relationship was, was very bitter against her mom and her dad, and it came up a handful of times as we met together, and it's the only time that I've done premarital counseling with a couple where I actually Looked at one of the persons and said, Do not marry this person.

And I've, I've not done that since or even before. So those of you that are waiting for premarital counseling, just that, that's not a normal thing. That, that I do, but, but that's how significant this anger and bitterness was. And, but there was a meeting where we were talking about this and I, I, I asked this gal, have you forgiven your parents?

She said, yes, I've, I've forgiven them. I'm not bitter. I, I, I'm not angry. And I then asked her, have you, have you ever gone out of your way to do real and practical kindness to your mom and dad?

And she said, no, I haven't. I said, what, let's talk right now about some specific tangible thing you can do to show love and kindness to your mom and dad. Her response was, You're kidding me. I am not going to do that for my mom and dad.

To which I replied, and that right there shows me that you have not forgiven your parents. You're still angry and bitter. If you refuse to do some deed of kindness that that other person might find delicious. to their taste.

Then you're angry, you're bitter, and you've not forgiven. So this 4th step is really a good measuring rod by which you can determine the depth of your forgiveness or whether or not you've even forgiven. I would also suggest that this 4th step is forgiveness. We're not just talking about something to tack on to the end of forgiveness.

This is actually a part of the definition of forgiveness. if you guys will recall, a number of weeks ago, when we looked at the two different big words for forgiveness in the New Testament, we came up with a definition of, forgiveness. And here's how we, define forgiveness based on the teaching of the New Testament. Someone wrongs you and to forgive them is A, to send away the sin from.

you and the one who committed the sin against you, and to hold that sin against him or her no longer be to send away the offender from the vengeance that he or she deserves from you, as a result of the sins they have committed. Against you. OK. So to forgive is to send away the sin from between you and that person and to send the person away from the prison cell of your wrath.

But letter C, the teaching of the New Testament is that forgiveness also means to positively favor that person with blessing that they don't deserve. That's a part of the definition. Of forgiveness. Write down Ephesians 4:32.

Paul tells us in that verse to be kind to one another, to do things that are good and serviceable to one another, doing things that one another would find delicious on the receiving end of, be kind to one another. tenderhearted, and then the New American Standard and other translations say forgiving one another as God has forgiven you. Those are great translations, because that's exactly what Paul is talking about. But literally, it reads, gracing one another, even as God and Christ has graced you.

And so how do I respond when someone wrongs me? Yeah, I withhold retaliation. Yes, I send away the sin from between me and that person, and I send the person away from the prison cell of my wrath. But it also means that I move toward that person and I grace them.

I show them positively favor by blessing them with some blessing. That they do not deserve. That's what God has done for us. That's how he graced us.

Paul says grace one another the way that God has graced you. God graced us by forgiving us. He graced us by sending away the sin from between us. He graced us by delivering us from the prison cell of his just wrath.

God has graced us in those ways. But not only that, but God has lavished his blessing on us. He's moved towards us, and he's lavished blessing upon us according to the riches of His amazing grace. And Paul says, go do that for each other.

Do that toward those who have wronged you. So this 4th step is vital. It's important, and it is forgiveness. If you don't do this step, you have not forgiven.

With the time we have, I just want to share with you 5 thoughts about this final step of doing good to those who have wronged you. 5 thoughts that I want to share with you this morning. Thought number 1 is God insists that we take this step. God insists that we take this step.

In Romans 12:17, Paul says, never pay back evil for evil to anyone. Respect what is right in the sight of all men. Never take your own revenge, beloved. But if your enemy is hungry, feed him and if he is thirsty, give him a drink.

Let's just stop right there. What Paul is saying is, turn towards your enemy. And see if there's anything in his or her life that you can render them some valuable service, and then do that. God insists on this.

Literally, it says, but if your enemy is hungry, you be feeding them. If your enemy is thirsty, you be giving to them a drink. You, God is insisting that you do this toward your enemy and the tense of, of the word feed and giving a drink is present tense denoting an action that continues. So, It's not like you just dive in and real quick, drop a soda off at their doorstep, and then you're gone and you can pat yourself on the back and say, I gave him a drink.

So I obeyed this. No, it's you be feeding them, you be giving them a drink. You say, well, the passage says if he's hungry or thirsty, but my enemy is not hungry or thirsty. So I don't have to do anything.

no, God would say, listen, I'm just giving you an example here. But the application of this goes far beyond just giving them something to eat or something to drink. Turn to your enemy and see if there's any need that they have in their life. This person who's wronged you, do they have any need in their life?

And maybe you can't even identify a need, but you identify a want or just something you can do that would be a blessing. Whatever that is, be creative, be specific, and then go out of your way to be doing that. God insists, the all wise God insists. That we do this.

He insists on this in 1 Peter 3. It says, to sum up, all of you be harmonious, sympathetic, brotherly, kindhearted, and humble in spirit, not returning evil for evil or insult for insult, but giving a blessing instead. So we're called to do more than just withhold retaliation. We're called to move towards the person who is wronging us and actually give them a blessing, speak a blessing to them, or actually engage in something and providing something or giving something, bringing something to them that would be a blessing to them.

In Luke 6, Jesus says, I say to you who hear, love your enemies, and do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you. So love, do good. And bless. Again, God is insisting, he is insisting that we take this vital step of making ourselves an agent of real and practical good to the person who has wronged us.

there's a second thought that I want to share with you guys, and that is that God tells us to expect this step to work powerfully in the life or upon the person who has wronged us. When we do kindness to someone who has wronged us, God says, I want you to expect that the doing of that will be powerful. Paul says, but if your enemy is hungry, you be feeding him, and if he is thirsty, you be giving him a drink, for in so doing, you will heap burning coals upon his head. Now, a few months back, we looked at this expression and what it means, and we're not going to belabor that this morning, except to pull out one statement that was a summation of all that we learned about what this expression means, and that is From a commentator, MR Vincent, not me, not related to me, but he has the same last name where he said in this context regarding this passage, this claim by Paul that kindness is as effectual as coals of fire.

So the thought of doing kindness to someone who has wronged you, you just need to realize this is the powerful thing that you have in your arsenal. See, where we go wrong is, someone wrongs us and we're evaluating, man, how do I want to respond here, and we check out all the tools we've got in our toolbox, all the possible responses, and we're looking at the silent treatment, lashing out, gossiping about, slandering their reputation, talking about them behind their back, physically hitting them, whatever, whatever it is, depending on your age.

And your situation. But we look at all those possible responses, retaliating with evil for evil.

And it's like, We look at those things and it's like, man, those are powerful, but I can't do that. God won't let me. And then God's pointing to this kindness. He and he says this is what you have to do and here's where we go wrong we think oh that's lame, but it's the only thing I'm allowed to do so I guess I'll just do kindness to the person who wronged me.

When what Paul is saying is, no, that's the most powerful thing that you have in your arsenal, and it's way more powerful, way more powerful than any evil that you might do by way of retaliation. It is as effectual as coals of fire upon the head. That's amazing. I did some research this week.

I googled what's the temperature of burning coals. I'm not sure why it just seemed like that would add if I could figure out the temperature of burning coals so that you would know that they're hot. and I don't know if I got my facts right, but I found a guy who did some research on that. He was researching people who walk on burning coals.

And he did some measurements in a few instances and in one case, the temperature of the burning coals was 1000 degrees, and on another occasion it was 1800 degrees. Don't know how true that is or not, but all I want to say is that that's hot. OK, that's hot and that's powerful. If I put burning coals on your head today as you're leaving the service, you would find that a powerful experience.

You would bear for the rest of your life the marks of that moment where I put burning coals upon your head. Whatever you think of regarding the power of that, attach that to kindness and doing good. To the person who has wronged you. And I'm not just wanting you guys to apply this to the, to those enemies that are in your life.

I'm talking about applying this to the people in your life who love you, that you've pledged your life to. I'm talking about applying this to your marriage relationship. Your relationship with family members, towards your parents and towards your children and other brothers and sisters in Christ, as well as to your enemies that are out there. We get so petty.

And we, we pull all this junk down from the shelf and use that thinking this is the powerful thing. This will really show them. And Paul's like, you're leaving the burning coals on the shelf. Use those and do kindness and do good to the person who has wronged you.

It's powerful. Robert Chapman. is a man. He died in 1903.

He pastored a congregation for a number of years in Barnstaple, England. This guy had such a reputation for being a loving man in the community and in his church and in all of England eventually that there was someone from across the ocean that wanted to write a letter to him but didn't know what address to send it to, so this is what they put on the envelope RC Chapman. University of Love, England. And it got to him.

That was his reputation for being a deeply loving, kindhearted man. Robert Chapman had some enemies in his ministry, and none were worse than a man in town who was a grocer. He owned a grocery store, and this man would mock and ridicule and belittle and do everything against Robert Chapman's ministry at every opportunity. On one occasion when Robert Chapman was preaching to a crowd of people, this man approached him and spit in his face.

That's never happened to me when like I've been preaching here at Cornerstone or anywhere else, and I can't imagine something like that actually happening and what might I feel toward that person in that moment and in the days that would follow. Well, about a week after the spitting incident, Robert Chapman's cousin came to visit him. and Robert Chapman was a bachelor for life, and his cousin showed up and his cousin was fairly well to do and was going through the pantry in his home and noticed there's really nothing here to eat.

So he asked Robert Chapman, Can I, can I go to the store and buy you some groceries and fill your pantries?

And Robert Chapman said, OK. And his cousin said, Well, where, where do I, where can I go to get some groceries for you? And Robert Chapman said, what, go to such and such grocery store. Owned by, and it was the guy who had spit in his face.

He said, I insist that you go only there, do business there. And get the groceries there. If you're willing to abide by that, I'll let you get me some groceries. So his cousin went to that particular store, bought a ton of groceries, and It's all sitting there being processed by the owner of this grocery store who hated Robert Chapman.

And the grocer said, Where do I send all of this to? And this cousin said to Robert Chapman, And the grocer said, there's obviously some mistake here, and the cousin said, no, there's no mistake. I wanted to buy him groceries and Robert Chapman insisted that I come to you and do business with you. This man was so blown away, he said, what, I've heard of these kinds of acts of kindness before, but I've never been the recipient of anything like this.

Tears came to his eyes and he became so broken by this kindness that Robert Chapman had shown him. That look at how he responded. I'll let one biographer of Robert Chapman tell you this. The man, the grocer, was so completely broken down by this because he had for years made Mr.

Chapman the target of his abuse and wicked criticism. In a short while, Chapman's relative, his cousin, was amazed to see him, the grocer, lying prostrate before the man of God in tears and sincere repentance, asking for forgiveness and yielding to Christ as his savior. Amen. That's how effectual kindness can be.

Now, it'd be nice if I could tell you this morning, anytime you do any kindness to anyone who wrongs you, guaranteed, they will prostrate themselves before you in tears and in genuine repentance, and call on the name of Jesus. It'd be nice if it always happened that way, and that quickly. It doesn't. In fact, there are times where you will show kindness to somebody, and they will never repent.

But whether they repent or not, this stands true, that the most powerful thing that you can do to anybody who has wronged you is to do kindness to them. John Calvin says it this way, our enemy, whatever his response, shall either be softened by our benefits, or if he be so savage that nothing can tame him, he shall yet be burnt and tormented by the testimony of his own conscience on finding himself overwhelmed with our kindness. Either way, Either way, kindness is the most powerful thing you can do toward those who wrong you.

There's a third thought that's worth sharing this morning regarding this final step of forgiveness, and that is that God tells us that the evil others do against us is overcome by taking this step.

You have not technically overcome. And conquered and been victorious until you do this step. So if you stop shy of this step, then you don't win. You're not a victor.

In Romans 12:20, it says, but if your enemy is hungry, you be feeding him, and if he is thirsty, you be giving him a drink, for in so doing, you will heap burning coals upon his head. Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil. With good. That word overcome means to be victorious.

This word overcome is the word that the company Nike gets its name. Nike means victor or victory. So you experience Nike over evil by doing good. Doing good is your weapon for victory over evil.

And so God is telling you in this passage that The evil that others do against you is only overcome completely and fully when you take this step. It's only overcome by doing. Good. One of the things, guys, that everybody has in common, the bitter person, the angry person, the forgiving person.

The thing that everybody has in common on the receiving end of wrongdoing is everyone wants to be an overcomer, right? Can we agree on that? Everyone wants to overcome. The evil that has just been done against them.

Everyone's agreed on that. Everyone wants to be an overcomer in those situations, but what happens is that many will choose to overcome evil with evil. I know how I can win in this situation. This person has done wrong against me.

I want to overcome what they have done, and I know how I will overcome their evil with evil. So they've given me the silent treatment. I will overcome their evil by giving them the silent treatment. They've disrespected me.

I will overcome their evil by disrespecting them. They've talked about me behind their back. I will overcome their evil by talking about them behind their back. For you younger children, he or she hit me, I will overcome their evil by hitting them in return, and on and on.

The list can go. Using evil as a tool to overcome an evil that is done against you. What Paul is saying is, if that's what you do, you've already lost. You've already lost.

If someone does evil against you, and you respond with evil, you've just made that person your master. You're a follower. You're just doing what they've done. They, they sin against you, so you sin against them.

They give you the silent treatment, so you give them the silent treatment, they disrespect you, so you disrespect them. They hit you, so you hit them, they yell at you, so you yell at them, you're just a follower. And you're giving that other person the ultimate victory, and you're allowing them to mold and shape you and your actions to make you just like them. Congratulations.

That is not overcoming, that's being overcome by evil. It's being a follower. It is not the path of victory. Paul would say, you only experience victory over evil when you respond to evil by doing real and practical good to the person who has wronged you.

And so here's what this corrects the notion that someone sins against you and you'll overcome their evil by doing evil, but another strategy we employ sometimes is someone wrongs you and you try to overcome their evil by doing nothing. I know what I'll do. I'll just walk away. I just won't talk to this person at all.

They're yelling at me, what, I'm just going to turn and walk away, and I'm not going to yell back at them. In fact, I won't ever even talk to them again. They're dead to me. They're out of my life.

And we walk away and pat ourselves on the back and say, Man, I'm a forgiving person. And I've just overcome. I have just overcome what they've done. Paul would say, No, you haven't.

No, you haven't. You have not overcome their evil until you have actually moved toward that person and done real and practical good. Toward them. So the strategy of retaliating with evil or the strategy of responding by doing nothing, that is not the path of victory.

The path of victory is responding to evil with good. There's a 4th thought that I just want to put before you this morning, and that is that God tells us in this passage that the evil in our own hearts is overcome by taking this final step of forgiveness, that the evil in our own hearts is overcome by taking this final step. Of forgiveness. This is not on the screen, but if you'll look in your Bibles at Romans 12:17, Paul says in verse 17, never pay back evil for evil to anyone.

All right? So let's just establish up front that there are actually two evils that are being spoken about in this passage. There's the evil that somebody has done against you, OK, and everyone sees that in the passage. In fact, that's often the only evil that people see in this passage.

There's the evil that someone does against you, but then there's the evil that is in your own heart that you're wanting to unleash upon them in retaliation. Does that make sense? So there's two evils the evil someone's committed against you and the evil that is now boiling in your heart that you're wanting to unleash upon that person. So what follows is a strategy for overcoming evil.

When you come to verse 21 and Paul says, Don't be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good, he's talking about both evils. The evil that the other person has done and the evil that is in your own heart that you're wanting to visit upon that person and you guys know what this is like. Someone sins against you, they wrong you, they let you down, they hurt you in some deep way, and there is evil that is springing up in your heart, all sorts of evil thoughts and malice against that person.

And you may act out on those things, or you may be mature enough not to act out on those things, but you, your imagination, you go there and you, you imagine acting out on those things.

You wish that you could. Even if you decide not to, there is evil that is at work and boiling in your heart that, that it won't take a lot for that evil to come, just blowing out of your heart upon that person in a shocking way. So how do you overcome that evil in you? Understand that the strategy Paul gives us here is not just a strategy for overcoming the other person's evil.

This is a strategy for overcoming the evil in your own heart, and what he's saying is this. If your enemy is hungry, you be feeding him, and if he is thirsty, you be giving him a drink. Yes, this will be powerful in the life of that person who is sinning against you. You'll be heaping burning coals on his head.

But not only that, Paul says, don't be overcome by the evil of this other person that he's done. or even by the evil in your own heart that you're wanting to visit upon him. Don't be overcome by either evil, but overcome evil, including the evil in your own heart, by doing good. So you then come back to verse 20 realize, part of the way that I overcome the evil in my own heart against this person is by doing good.

To them. You guys know how the last few weeks we've talked about how it can often happen that you forgive somebody and 5 minutes later you're boiling with anger again and then you have to re-forgive. Sometimes that's inevitable. But what I have found is more often than not, when I find that happening with me, it's usually because I have not gone on the offense and done real and practical good to that person.

that I have forgiven. And I'm simply fighting a defensive battle. It's like, man, I forgive them, Lord, I forgive them and I've done it all right. And then 5 minutes later, I'm angry again, and there's like evil in my heart against them.

I want to hurt them. I want to, I've got malice in my heart against them. I may hate that person and so evil is at work in me, and I may confess that to the Lord and say, Lord, help me to forgive. I forgive, I forgive, I forgive.

Five minutes later, that's boiling in my heart again. How do I overcome that evil in me? Paul would say, Be creative. Think of some way you can do real and practical good to that person, and then execute that, do that.

And in the process of doing that, you will overcome the evil in your own heart as well as the other person's evil, guys, I can. I'm not going to tell specific stories, but I'm just telling you, there have been times in my life where I have felt, malice in my heart towards people and I have forgiven 5 minutes later, angry again, and I've gone through that for weeks. But there have been times where God has pointed me to this passage, and he's like, what, Milton, you've been forgiving, but you've not been closing the deal.

Do something kind to this person.

And so I'll think about some specific thing I can do for that person, and there have been times where I've taken those steps to do real and practical good to that individual, sometimes even anonymously, and, and what I have experienced in just about every case is the evil in my own heart is overcome. And there was one time I was standing in a store about to buy the item for this person who had offended me. And that I was feeling angry and hateful towards. I hadn't even bought the item yet.

And I stopped and realized, wait a minute, I love this guy. The hatred and the anger is gone, and I have nothing but love for him. And I ended up buying that item and a couple of days later giving it to the guy and he didn't prostrate himself and say, Oh, I'm such a sinner, didn't do that. But what?

I didn't need him to do that. I was experiencing victory in my own heart. And there are times where situations are complicated enough to where you can't even do kindness towards someone. And have them know it's from you.

And so sometimes it's, it's wise to just do something anonymously where they don't ever know that it came from you, but the process of thinking through something and then taking the steps to put that together and then to mail that to them or deliver that to them, that process of doing that, I'm telling you, is hugely powerful. And overcoming the evil in your own heart. Guys, stop fighting a defensive battle. Forgiveness is so much more than just withholding retaliation.

Forgiveness means going crazy. With loving and doing real and practical kindness. To the person that has wronged you. It'll get you unstuck emotionally.

Nancy Lee Demas in her book, Choosing Forgiveness says this, I've talked with people who believe they've truly forgiven their offender. They press the delete key, but they still feel stuck emotionally. When they think of that person, they still feel tied up in knots. They've not been able to move forward with any peace or freedom.

Something is still holding them back. God's word gives us an important key to going all the way with forgiveness. It requires that we go above and beyond just releasing our offender. And that we extend the grace of God and build bridges of love by returning blessing for cursing and good for evil.

What she's saying is the key to getting unstuck is to do what Paul says in Romans 12:20 and 21 and do real practical good to that person who has wronged you. There's a final thought to share with you this morning, and that is that God wants us to be motivated by the gospel to take this step. You knew we had to end here. you may say, man, Pastor Milton, the wrongs that have been done against me from years past or even that I'm in the middle of now, I don't want to forgive.

I, it's all I can do to just withhold retaliation, and I'm, I'm OK with that for now. I'm happy with that. I'm proud of that fact. But in terms of actually going before God and asking God to bless that person, and for me to volunteer to be an agent of that blessing in that person's life, I'm not going to do that.

Well, fair enough. But Paul would say to you, you really ought to take some time to ponder and celebrate the fact that you are daily as a Christian living in the good of a salvation that has come to you, precisely because somebody has already lived out this ethic towards you in a massive and eternal way. You had sinned against God. You killed His Son Jesus, and God at that very place where he saw you at your worst, moved towards you with love and forgiveness, and He forgave you of your sins, and then having released you from the prison cell of His wrath and having sent the sin away from between you and Him, God moved towards you and has been loving you ever since, even in your moments where you're talking the way that you just talked right now.

God's grace is amazing, and we are the recipients of that. And Paul would say, now why I didn't start the book of Romans by giving you these instructions in Romans 12:20 and 21. Now why I spent the 1st 11 chapters laying out the glories of the grace of God that are towards you in the gospel, because it's only now on the other side of having laid all of that out, that you have the fuel that you need. to actually obey what I'm telling you to do.

It's only now that you have the equipment that you need to be able to do this in a sustained way. Paul in Romans 12:1 begins the chapter by saying, therefore, in light of all these gospel realities, I urge you, brethren, by the mercies of God, by the tender mercies that God has shown towards you. He looked at you in your sin. And yes, there was something in you that drew God to you.

what it was? You were so pathetic. You were so pitiable. That God's heart went out to you, and He has forgiven you and lavished you with all of this love, all of this freedom, power, relationship, and blessing, and He will do so for all of eternity as Paul has been laying out.

And Paul says, I urge you, brethren, by these mercies of God that I've just unfolded for you. And then comes a series of commands, among which is verse 20. If your enemy is hungry, you be feeding him. And if he's thirsty, you be giving him something to drink and thus overcome evil with good.

God doesn't want you to just do this. He wants you to do this being motivated and molded by the gospel. This is the overcoming way. This is the victorious way.

This is the path of power. It is not the path of weakness, and only those who are sustained and strengthened. And educated in the gospel, who are walking in the good of the gospel, savoring God's grace day by day can actually carry this out. Let's bow together in prayer and ask God to help us to Live this out.

And if God has spoken to your heart in any way, just put that on the back of the connection card so that we can just know how we can pray for you if you're visiting with us. Let us know that if you feel comfortable doing so and Let us know how God has spoken to your heart or any prayer requests that you have, praises that you have. Let us know where you're at in your journey and how we can maybe come alongside of you and help you or at least support you through prayer. God, we just come to you right now and we ask that You would help us to Grow strong in forgiveness.

That we would be a forgiving people. Such that the world would look upon us and think us crazy. Make us a people of grace who are amazed at the grace you have given to us and thus who are happy to give the same grace to others. We thank you also, Lord, for this opportunity to give of our offerings to you.

Receive these funds, Lord, do much with them for the glory of Jesus. At the same time we give ourselves to you in full surrender in the name of Jesus, and all God's people said,